My Personal Insights:
I have some very exciting news to share with all of
you. My book, "Mindfulness and The Art of Choice:
Transform Your Life" has won two awards: one
for Best Personal Self-growth Book in 2009 (Walsh
Seminars) and Honorary mention in the Self-help
category by Readers Views. Not sure it will get me on
Oprah but I'm sure you can, of course, imagine how
special this is to me. Naturally, I also see this as
having meaning as a message from which to learn.
Not a member yet? To receive your copy of
helpful tips to create more satisfying and powerful
choice relationships, simply fill in your e-mail address
in the box below and click "Join." You will receive
this newsletter once a month.
|
|
|
Putting in Effort
When I meet clients for the initial visit, there are a
couple of factors that are really important in order for
me to feel our work together can be successful. The
first is whether they are presenting an issue that I
have experience with and that I know how to assist
with. The other is if we connect -- research indicates
that the relationship between you and your therapist is
very important for the outcome of the process.
But - then there's one more crucial factor. Is the
person willing to put in the work necessary to make
changes? As I often tell people as an analogy, I can
take you to a gym with lots of equipment and show you
how to use the machines, but unless you get on the
machines and work them, you won't see results.
The same is true in your relationships -- in your
partnerships, with your friends, with your family
members, in your work situations. If you want things
to change, you have to work at it. And - you may not
see results right away. Just like writing my book, you
plug away giving it your all, but it may take some time
before you get results that are truly validating of all you
have put into it.
|
|
Choice Tips:
|
|
- If you want a situation to change, you have to be
the one to make the change. Though you can't expect
someone else to change, chances are that when you
act differently, they will respond differently (Action =
Reaction).
- When people make efforts to do things differently,
they like to know that their efforts have been noticed. If
your partner is trying to do something differently, let
him or her know you've noticed.
- If you're involved with someone who's willing to
make a change in order for things to be better, don't
expect that it will change over night. Respond
positively to the small differences that are made along
the way.
- If there's a setback, it doesn't mean you've gone
back to square one. Be willing to see it as just that - a
setback. Change is not a constantly forward
process; rather it's an upward spiral (it moves up
and then slips down a bit).
- If you are the one attempting to make changes or
start something new, set realistic expectations for
yourself. When you have a setback or get stuck, be
kind to yourself instead of being self-critical. Making
blaming statements will only impede your process
and it's likely you've heard enough of them growing
up.
- If you're starting to do something different and get
caught in fear, remind yourself of other times you did
something you were afraid of and it went well.
- If you make mistakes along the way, these are
opportunities for growth as long as you are willing to
look at what happened and learn from them.
|
|
Additional Resources I Recommend:
|
|
There are many quotes I've been keeping. I would like
to share several of them with you now because they're
pertinent to the theme of this newsletter:
"Though no one can go back and make a brand
new start, anyone can start from now and make a
brand new ending."
~Carl Bard
"You must accept that you might fail; then, if you do
your best and still don't win, at least you can be
satisfied that you've tried. If you don't accept failure as
a possibility, you don't set high goals, you don't branch
out, you don't try - you don't take the risk."
~Rosalyn Carter
Failure is a temporary condition for the winner and
we all have a winner inside of us.
You need to push yourself and grow, or you will
stagnate and live an empty and shallow life. Humans
are truly happiest when engaged in the pursuit of
worthy and challenging goals.
Everyone who is rich, famous, successful and
happy has gone through failure on their way to
success. You can too!
If you aren't failing (and often) then you aren't
pushing yourself.
"No one is in control of your happiness but you;
therefore, you have the power to change anything
about yourself or your life that you want to change."
~Barbara De Angelis
I also suggest - If you want to see a delightful
film that really speaks to the idea of putting forth effort
and the joy it can bring you, I suggest watching
"Young at Heart."
|
|
Empowering Tools and Information:
|
|
As I'm sure you read in the emails I sent you, I was
offering a teleseminar, "Psychological Bailout." I want
you to know that it was tremendously received by
those who participated.
I know you've all
heard enough doom and gloom about our present
economic situation. That's why in this 45-minute
teleseminar I packed in a huge amount of concrete
information and tools that were helpful and
positive!
The special deal I offered for that call is
over. But, again, because you are loyal readers of
mine, for the next week I will offer this MP3 download
of this call for the discounted rate of
$12.95.After this week, the product will be on sale
for $19.95.
Click here to Purchase!
Please Note: In order to take advantage of the
special $12.95 offer, you will have to enter "BAILOUT"
in the Coupon Code at checkout.
EXTRA SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT:
For Ladies Only: Watch for an e-mail coming
your way for a very special offer I'm going to make to
you. And for the Guys: If there's a special lady
you're involved with, you'll want to open the email and
forward it to her. This is something that I know will
change your relationship around!
|
|
|
